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Mulla Nasrudin, who was really unaccustomed to public speaking, arose in confusion after dinner
and muttered hesitatingly:
”M-m-my f-f-friends, when I came here tonight only God and myself knew what I was about to say to
you AND NOW ONLY GOD KNOWS!”

After the bride’s first dinner, she asked her husband, Mulla Nasrudin, ”Now, dear, what will I get if I
cook a dinner like that for you everyday?”
”MY LIFE INSURANCE,” said Nasrudin.

Mulla Nasrudin’s young wife, recently returned from her honeymoon, was complaining to her friend
about her husband’s drinking habits.
”If you knew he drank, why did you marry him?” her friend asked.
”I DID NOT KNOW HE DRANK,” said Nasrudin’s wife, ”UNTIL ONE NIGHT HE CAME HOME
SOBER.”

Mulla Nasrudin, who had just passed his test for his first-aid certificate, was on his way home.
Suddenly, he saw a man lying face down in the street. Without a second thought, he threw himself
upon the man and began applying artificial respiration.
After a while, the man raised his head and said, ”SIR, I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TRYING
TO DO, BUT I AM TRYING TO FISH A WIRE DOWN THIS MANHOLE.”